ALERT CODE RED

So last night Amanda & I are in the back yard just hanging out with the dogs.

2 siblings are walking down the street that runs alongside our back yard, and as they pass by, their talking escalates into arguing. 

"you ain't telling me what to do"
"oh yes I am"
"well I’m gonna tell ..." etc.

The dogs hear the unidentified voices, initiate code Red, sound the alarm, and race to the fence.

Max and Seamus run to the fence you can see through, to assure the borders have not been compromised, but Spike the incredible pole vaulting dog (who is chained up), has another tactic. He jumps up, reaches the top of the 6ft fence and balances atop it.

The kids start screeching like the apocalypse is upon them.

"OHMYGOD HES COMING OVER DA FENCE"
"$%^ THAT DOG CRAZY"
“HES COMING OVER DA FENCE”

Spike, following the shock & awe rules of engagement, pauses at the top for 5 seconds, then jumps down, goes as far as the chain allows (the curb), and keeps barking.

The kids continue with their apocalyptic shrieks.

Amanda races out of the yard to unchain Spike and return him to base.

The girl (maybe 8 or 9 yrs.) standing with her hand on her hip, keeps yelling at Amanda, "you needs to put that dog in da house".

Amanda, choking back laughter, brings Spike to the gate and waits for me to open it. I can't even move because I am laughing so hard.

Max unable to see anything from his vantage point goes to Spikes last known coordinates, and jumps up on the fence.

Imagine our little friend’s horror, as the Loch Ness monster of dogs slowly appears above the fence; with a large head, neck and 2 paws, fully visible, and starts barking at them.

Boy - OHMYGOT THERES A BIGGER ONE
GIRL - no words just screeching
BOY - DAT ONES COMIN OVER DA FENCE TOO?!?!
GIRL - more screeching
BOY - YOU GOT CRAZY DOGS WE GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE
GIRL - hand back on hip, "You need to put DAT dog in da house"
GIRL – “You just need to put DAT dog in da house”

Max stops barking at them but remains in his position, and continues to observe.
The girl is getting more demanding and waving her finger -
"you NEED to put DAT dog in da house"

Amanda tries to speak "he is ....." and she can't utter any more words without laughing, so she waves her hand in a circle two times followed by a wave towards the back yard, which may, in some cultures, be the universal sign for "stop you’re screeching, that dog can't jump the fence".

The little girl just keeps repeating her order, and as always the case in war, there are no winners, so I pulled Max down from his command post and drug him in the back door. Amanda took Spike in the front door, where we discovered Howard, Tyler & Carson in hysterics, who had all been watching the melee from different levels in the house.

Just another day.

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